Privacy and Your Preteen
Should you ‘spy’ on your kids?
There is a growing debate surrounding this question. Today, mass media makes it hard to control what influences your child imbibes. In addition, technology provides the world countless ways of reaching your child. Beyond telephones and snail mail, now they have cellphones, email, instant messaging and the internet! We parents can’t help but be concerned about just what our children are up to.
Now, reconcile this with your preteen. If you have a child between the ages of nine and twelve, you must be feeling the challenges of preteen parenting. Suddenly, your child doesn’t want to be treated like her younger siblings. She wants more independence, and is beginning to ask for more privacy. She is greatly influenced by her peers, and would like to spend as much time with them as possible. If she’s in middle school, then almost half of her waking time is spent outside your home. She’s also building friendships with other kids that you didn’t know from before.
All those years before, you carefully molded and prepared your child for engaging the world on her own. Now, the preteen years are here for a test run. The question is, are you ready to trust your child?
Most parents say, "I trust my child, but I don’t trust the world". That’s valid. Your first concern is always for her safety. However, recognize too that your child is also blossoming into her own person. Her request for privacy is not necessarily a step away from you. Rather, it is a step toward her own growth. As her parent, you want that for her too, right?
So, how much privacy does your preteen deserve? Here’s the win-win answer. She should have just enough privacy to feel secure, and just enough for you to keep her safe.
Set the non-negotiables. Sit down with your child and talk about the balance between her privacy and her protection. Together, list down details which you both agree are always important for you to know. This includes knowing who her friends are, where they live and what their telephone numbers are (especially if she spends time in their house). You’ll also need to know everyday details like where she’s going and who she’ll be with. Clearly establish what is not allowed from the outset. This can vary from one family to another, depending on personal values and the environment.
Sit down with your child and talk about the balance between her privacy and her protection. Together, list down details which you both agree are always important for you to know. This includes knowing who her friends are, where they live and what their telephone numbers are (especially if she spends time in their house). You’ll also need to know everyday details like where she’s going and who she’ll be with. Clearly establish what is not allowed from the outset. This can vary from one family to another, depending on personal values and the environment.Give her space. However ironic, realize that your preteen still needs some privacy even if she does live in your house. If it’s not a non-negotiable, respect her space. Better to give her room for self-expression there, rather than having her go and do it somewhere else away from you. At least there, you’re kept aware even from a distance. More often than not anyway, your child has nothing to hide. But if she feels you constantly looking over her shoulder (literally and figuratively), she just might start leaving her journal at school, or begin going to a friend’s house for the internet. Don’t give her a reason to keep things from you deliberately.
. However ironic, realize that your preteen still needs some privacy even if she live in your house. If it’s not a non-negotiable, respect her space. Better to give her room for self-expression there, rather than having her go and do it somewhere else away from you. At least there, you’re kept aware even from a distance. More often than not anyway, your child has nothing to hide. But if she feels you constantly looking over her shoulder (literally and figuratively), she just might start leaving her journal at school, or begin going to a friend’s house for the internet. Don’t give her a reason to keep things from you deliberately.Talk about trust. Discuss with your child the important role of mutual trust in the preteen stage. Point out that privacy is protected by trust. Remind her too that trust is hard earned. Once it’s broken, it’s even harder to regain. Lastly, remember that the point of this discussion is mutual trust. It’s a two-way street.
Discuss with your child the important role of mutual trust in the preteen stage. Point out that privacy is protected by trust. Remind her too that trust is hard earned. Once it’s broken, it’s even harder to regain. Lastly, remember that the point of this discussion is trust. It’s a two-way street.If you sneak around reading your child’s email, think about the message that sends to her on how trust should be valued.
Be open. Most importantly, let your child know that she can talk to you about anything. Make her feel secure to approach you with any problem or concern. Create an open atmosphere where she can be honest with you without fear of being judged. When she does talk, listen neutrally and sincerely. If at other times she keeps her emotions to herself, respect that choice too.
Most importantly, let your child know that she can talk to you about anything. Make her feel secure to approach you with any problem or concern. Create an open atmosphere where she can be honest with you without fear of being judged. When she does talk, listen neutrally and sincerely. If at other times she keeps her emotions to herself, respect that choice too.Recognizing the privacy and ensuring the safety of your preteen can be quite an emotional balancing act. With good communication however, and a mutual commitment to trust, you’ll not only be a responsible parent, but a ‘cool’ one too!
- Leon Edward
Leon Edward helps people improve in Career Development, Goal Setting, Leadership, Success, Motivation, Self-Improvement, Happiness, Memory Improvement, Stress Reduction and more through his articles, blogs, reports and self-help success roladex-on-line. Visit his Success-Leadership Library, Articles at http://www.AwesomeSuccess.org
Leon Edward also helps people improve IQ, focus, memory, concentration, creativity, speed reading, public speaking , time management and reducing stress.
Download his IQ Mind Brain Memory Self-Help library at his website http://www.IQMindBrainLibrary.com
FREE Identity Theft Prevention Checklist
Leon Edward provides information online on identity theft prevention and FREE Identity Theft Prevention Checklist at his website http://www.PreventIdentityTheftFraud.com
Subconscious Programming | Home Based Business Ideas | Focus on the Family Blog
]]>Everyone has an image to take care of. Whether you like it or not, people will often scrutinize your looks. If you want to create your image, decide now! You can stand by and improve your own image or be a shadow of someone else. Many people shy away because they are so conscious of their appearance. Here are just five simple steps on how to enhance your image and to build the must have self confidence.
1. Feel good about yourself. Positive thinking is a good enhancer of personality. Nothing compares to an aura of self contentment and serenity. Shyness is developed by negative thoughts that others are far better than you. Stop that nonsense and start appreciating yourself. Look at the mirror every morning and say to yourself "You are a beautiful creation of God!"
2. Positive image starts in you. A good character is admirable and gives you credibility. Live harmoniously and be at peace with everyone. How can you project a positive image if your real life doesn’t say so? You can really feel shameful if you have criminal records. The real idea of an enhanced image is brought about by living decently.
3. Appearance. Good looking and fashionable people are the ones who get more attention from the audience. Being shy can also be a product of not so being confident on how you look in front of people. To enhance your image, you may want to consider these points relative to your appearance:
• Clean body that comes with clothes. Be sure that you are clean from head to toe. Hygiene and proper grooming are important aspects in image enhancement. Putting on that clean apparel from top to bottom can give you an edge in any occasions. Making sure that your body and what you’re wearing are neat will help you feel secure about yourself and your appearance.
• Proper color coordination. Be careful on what you wear as this can be a mirror of your personality. Combination of colors should be perfect. Neck ties should be matched with your inner shirt; belts and shoes should have the same color.
• Put on the right make up. Woman should always be conscious about her make up. Any color will do for fair skinned while light shades of purple and pink goes with dark skinned women. Choosing the right lipstick should also be a priority.
• Clean cut hair. You wouldn’t want to look like a rock star over a corporate meeting. Make sure that your hair is well trimmed and that it doesn’t cover your face.
4. Gaining a positive image will also be incorporated in your movements and ease in front of a crowd. You should develop eye contact and facial expressions appropriate to certain circumstances. Smiling is one sure way of gaining some people’s trust. This can also involve the proper actuations in a social gathering. Etiquette is necessary to develop your presence in any events.
5. Seek the help of a professional image enhancer. There are also certain books which will help you with the information on how to develop your image and do away with shyness. You can invest on these things to make sure that you are properly guided.
Enhancing your image is one good way of overcoming your shyness. It can boost your self confidence knowing that you appear respectable and neat in front of anyone. Positive image can spell success thus it should always be cultivated.
- Leon Edward
Leon Edward helps people improve in Career Development, Goal Setting, Leadership, Success, Motivation, Self-Improvement, Happiness, Memory Improvement, Stress Reduction and more through his articles, blogs, reports and self-help success roladex-on-line. Visit his Success-Leadership Library, Articles at http://www.AwesomeSuccess.org
Leon Edward also helps people improve IQ, focus, memory, concentration, creativity, speed reading, public speaking , time management and reducing stress.
Download his IQ Mind Brain Memory Self-Help library at his website http://www.IQMindBrainLibrary.com
FREE Identity Theft Prevention Checklist
Leon Edward provides information online on identity theft prevention and FREE Identity Theft Prevention Checklist at his website http://www.PreventIdentityTheftFraud.com
Subconscious Programming | Home Based Business Ideas | Focus on the Family Blog
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Anger is so easy to ignite, and so hard to defuse. It is the most destructive of emotions, and one of the hardest to handle. Anger has led to physical violence, property destruction, and other damage that has ranged in severity from the disappointing to the devastating. Anger is the undercurrent that envelops domestic violence that leads to divorce, and it is the driving force of terrorism.
While these might lead you to believe that anger is too dangerous to toy with, that suppression is the only answer, let me tell you that it is NOT healthy. Suppressed anger leads to cardiovascular disease. Medical research has found evidence that those people who suppress their anger, don’t deal with it, and seethe inside, are at an elevated risk for coronary heart disease.
So what is to be done with anger, then? Deal with it.
Yes, you heard me, deal with it.
Now while some therapists use a rubber-coated bat and a pillow or a punching bag to allow their clients to release their anger on inanimate objects, there is a more docile way to deal with anger. Self-talk.
It is so simple to use actually. When you feel your temper rising and the conflict escalating, stop. Breathe. And walk away.
When you do, but your mind still races with intense, knotted emotions, this is the time to do self-talk. When you start cursing the one who offended you, stop. Restructure what you just thought and say it out loud in more rational terms. Instead of, "That idiot just ruined my day! Speeding! Thanks to him I have a dented door!" think about why that person was speeding. Maybe he was hurrying to get to the hospital because his wife is in labor. Say, out loud to yourself your theory why the guy was speeding.
Instead of, "She just had to spill ketchup on me! Now look! My silk blouse needs to go to the cleaners!" try to think of reasons why your offender was clumsy. "Maybe she was working for 24 hours straight. Maybe that’s why her coordination’s not so good."
Always reframe your thoughts in a proactive way. In a way that you take charge of the situation and not stand there like a victim, gaping and sputtering all your indignation at someone who just may have had as bad a day as you.
Remember what I echoed from the findings of medical experts. With every second your face gets redder, you are bound to harm your body and your relationships. Anger is definitely not worth the havoc it wreaks.
- Leon Edward
Leon Edward helps people improve in Career Development, Goal Setting, Leadership, Success, Motivation, Self-Improvement, Happiness, Memory Improvement, Stress Reduction and more through his articles, blogs, reports and self-help success roladex-on-line. Visit his Success-Leadership Library, Articles at http://www.AwesomeSuccess.org
Leon Edward also helps people improve IQ, focus, memory, concentration, creativity, speed reading, public speaking , time management and reducing stress.
Download his IQ Mind Brain Memory Self-Help library at his website http://www.IQMindBrainLibrary.com
FREE Identity Theft Prevention Checklist
Leon Edward provides information online on identity theft prevention and FREE Identity Theft Prevention Checklist at his website http://www.PreventIdentityTheftFraud.com
Subconscious Programming | Home Based Business Ideas | Focus on the Family Blog
]]>So you’re in a new stage in your life. Either you’ve graduated from high school or college, decided to move on from a suffocating job, or just basically in a new stage in your life. You want to plan out the steps you want to take now, and you want to make the best choices that life has to offer.
Get a pen and paper; we have lots of writing to do.
On that piece of paper, put a heading in the center: Mission/Vision.
Take some time to think about this. Take hours. Days. Weeks. It doesn’t matter, but give yourself a deadline. When you have thought it over, write down what you would want to achieve by the end of your life. What do you want to build your life around? Is it to attain certain educational milestones? Earn a certain amount of money? Be a philanthropist? State it under your Mission/Vision. This will be the center theme of your life. You can change it any time you want, but the entire list will be built around this.
Under Mission/Vision, divide the paper into two equal halves. One side will go to Short-term Goals. The other side will go to Long-term Goals.
Under the Short-term Goals, write down everything you want to get done within five years. Under Long-term Goals, write down the milestones you want throughout your life.
In the Short-term Goals, assign the deadlines by which you want these goals done. In the Long-term Goals, assign your age by which you would want to achieve these milestones.
Now rewrite the entire list in chronological order, then examine your list. Commit to memory your Short-term Goals, and the Long-term Goals you have for this year. If you have trouble remembering your list, use a calendar. A paper one will do, but you can also use a computer program if you have one, or an application in whatever handheld gadget you have (a PDA or cellular phone with reminder or calendar applications would do fine).
The purpose of this exercise is for you to have a visual representation of your goals. Having a visual representation of your goals heightens the chances that you will commit to seeing them done. Knowing that you have concretized your plans gives you more resolution to stick to these.
But even if you have your plans on paper, you will need to remember that you have to be flexible. Life is fluid, and seldom goes according to plan. But if you really want to reach your goals, despite the shifts in life, you will always revert to your "blueprint" (the paper outline you just made).
Your Mission/Vision, as said earlier, will be the theme driving your choices. This will be the anchor when storms rock your life’s boat. The chain links of your anchor will be your personal values, principles, and your growth in character.
It would help if you would keep a diary to outline the life lessons you’ve learned, and your driving values and principles. When faced with dilemmas, revert to these. It may not make the problems go away, but they will help in making decisions, especially if these decisions tempt you to compromise.
Sail through the sea of life, and remember, you have an anchor when storms come your way.
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Leon Edward helps people improve in Leadership Development, Goal Setting, Success, Motivation, Self-Improvement, Happiness, Memory Improvement, Stress Reduction and more through his articles, blogs, reports and self-help success roladex-on-line. Visit his Success-Leadership Library, Articles at http://www.AwesomeSuccess.org
Leon Edward also helps people improve IQ, focus, memory, concentration, creativity, speed reading, public speaking , time management and reducing stress.
Download his IQ Mind Brain Memory Self-Help library at his website http://www.IQMindBrainLibrary.com
The saying that "you can do whatever you can put your mind to," is true. If you have read the success stories of countless men and women’s rise to the top, you would note that there is a lot of dreaming involved. Some took dreaming to a higher level. When Eva Longoria did not win the title crown in her first attempt at a beauty pageant, she set her mind to winning it the next year by working her hardest to immerse herself in being the Miss Corpus Christi. She lived and breathed getting the crown by watching videos over and over and immersing herself and basically focusing on being the queen that she knew she had to be.
The saying that "you can do whatever you can put your mind to," is true. If you have read the success stories of countless men and women’s rise to the top, you would note that there is a lot of dreaming involved. Some took dreaming to a higher level. When Eva Longoria did not win the title crown in her first attempt at a beauty pageant, she set her mind to winning it the next year by working her hardest to immerse herself in the Miss Corpus Christi. She lived and breathed getting the crown by watching videos over and over and immersing herself and basically focusing on being the queen that she knew she had to be.
She had what we need to have to reach our own crowns: tenacity, focus, and the will to visualize.
Visualizing your way to success needs commitment and focus. You have to want your goal so bad that you are willing to do everything it takes to get there. You have to do what Eva Longoria did: live and breathe your goal.
But first, be very clear about your goal. Believe in it, commit to seeing it through to the moment you attain it and beyond. And then you can start visualizing.
We have heard of overweight people who would post pictures on their refrigerator pictures of the people they would want to look like. And that is a good start. Surround yourself with pictures of what you want to be, or what you want to attain; that way you would see your goal with crystal clarity.
Next is, you should start waking up with your goal in mind. You may want to think of it just a few moments in a day, or you can constantly think about it. Do not allow yourself to believe that your dreams are too far to reach. Just keep yourself focused on the goal, and nothing else. If you do flounder, pick yourself back up, and go back to focusing on your goal.
Next is, line up your options in attaining that goal. Choose the best path for you, no matter how easy or hard, as long as you’re comfortable with it and would stick with it. If something happens that you get frustrated with that path, strike out on the other options. Keep trying until you see your path opening up, and you see yourself progressing towards your goal.
It is not enough to do all these unless you arm yourself with knowledge. If there is something that keeps people frustrated and drifting, it will be the lack of knowledge. Learn everything there is to learn about your goal. And use this knowledge to progress on your path.
Keep on dreaming, while making the concrete steps. Seize every opportunity leading yourself to your goals, and when setbacks come, pick yourself up and walk on. Remember that you are only a failure when you succumb to the temptation to quit.
Remember that no mountain is too steep to climb. We just have to put one foot in front of the other. A 30-inch pizza is finished off one bite, one slice at a time. Surely, no goal would be too impossible. Just live, breathe, and eventually attain, your dreams.
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Leon Edward helps people improve in Leadership Development, Goal Setting, Success, Motivation, Self-Improvement, Happiness, Memory Improvement, Stress Reduction and more through his articles, blogs, reports and self-help success roladex-on-line. Visit his Success-Leadership Library, Articles at http://www.AwesomeSuccess.org
Leon Edward also helps people improve IQ, focus, memory, concentration, creativity, speed reading, public speaking , time management and reducing stress.
Download his IQ Mind Brain Memory Self-Help library at his website http://www.IQMindBrainLibrary.com
Many people are known to procrastinate to some extent but some people become chronic procrastinators. This hinders them from accomplishing their goals and becomes disruptive to their careers.
To combat the destructive habit of procrastination, you must become aware of the instances in your daily life when you begin procrastinating. Then you have to understand why you procrastinate, whether just sometimes or chronically, then undertake effective time management methods so you can guide your career accordingly.
People procrastinate when they do not do what they have to do right away, usually putting it off because they want to do something that is more comfortable or enjoyable. Procrastinators may work just as long as a non-procrastinator on a certain task but it may be the wrong task. To combat this trend, try to make a list differentiating between an urgent task and an important task – important tasks take precedence.
Procrastinators may also put off a task because they feel overwhelmed by it, thinking that the job is too big for them or they lack the necessary skills or resources to complete it. This leads procrastinators to simply do easier tasks, without realizing that they are wasting time not tackling the larger task right away.
Procrastinators could also be perfectionists, have poor organizational skills or find their decision making skills to be retarded, maintain a fear of failure or success, or simply be waiting…and waiting…and waiting for the right mood to hit them before they undertake the task.
But regardless of the cause of your procrastination, you should be aware of it and be ready to deal with it right away. Otherwise you risk losing your career.
The first step is to be honest with yourself so you will recognize when you are procrastinating.
The next step is to keep a To Do List that will help you guide your daily activities. Many people neglect this obvious step because they think they already know what to do.
Then, you have to explain to yourself why you are procrastinating. The reasons for this may fluctuate between your behavior and the task itself.
Afterwards, you should find a way to motivate yourself to tackle the job you have set aside. This may be harder than just telling yourself STOP PROCRASTINATING! You can opt to reward yourself after undertaking the task. Or get peer pressure to work for you by asking a co-worker to check up on your progress after some time. If you still cannot work, it may be time to tell yourself what are the negative effects of leaving the task unfinished – this includes being booted out of the job, sad to say.
For those who find themselves overwhelmed by the task, they can break it down into a series of smaller and more manageable components that make up a larger Action Plan. You will be surprised how far you will go just taking each step as it comes.
- Leon Edward
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Leon Edward helps people improve in Leadership Development, Goal Setting, Success, Motivation, Self-Improvement, Happiness, Memory Improvement, Stress Reduction and more through his articles, blogs, reports and self-help success roladex-on-line. Visit his Success-Leadership Library, Articles at http://www.AwesomeSuccess.org
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For example, you may not be a very athletic person, but engaging into sports is something that you know your body needs. Improving your physical fitness will definitely give your body and the heart a good boost. Playing sports is more than just physical consideration. Being good in sports helps one feel good about him or her self.
You may also consider yourself as not that competent when it comes to solving math problems or finishing trick puzzles. These are ordinary activities that can frustrate you when left unaccomplished. Improvement on these matters will definitely help your performance.
Deciding to improve your self is definitely a good first step. However, there is more to know. To do this, you must know just exactly how.
How to Improve Your Performance
Improvement basically means making better of something. This needs serious considerations to utilize something for a good purpose.
There are various ways by which you can improve on yourself.
1. Focus
There may be facets in your life that you want to enhance. However, you may not be able to improve on all of them at the same time. You may have to settle for one or two things at a time to accomplish something.
For example, you can practice your math skills and physical prowess at a given period. However, you may end up getting confused later if you add another hobby to the menu like learning to play an instrument. Take one endeavor at a time. You may want to be holistic as much as possible, but do not sacrifice the quality of learning with the quantity of things you want to improve.
2. Determine Your Weak Spots
Another thing you can do to enhance your performance results is to know your weak areas. You cannot improve completely unless you know the aspects that pose a problem to your situation.
3. Discipline Yourself
You will also benefit from developing a good sense of discipline. This entails coming up with a set of rules so that you concentrate on your actions to those that will lead you to your desired goal.
Discipline yourself. Improvement does not happen overnight but you can at least make sure that you maintain yourself in the right path.
4. Explore Ways to Learn
You can also consider other ways to learn about a particular field. Reading books may be helpful but there are other options to stimulate the mind and challenge the body. Try looking for a mentor to help you. You can also find a challenger to whom you can exercise your skills with, like having a friend to compete with when you do sports activities.
5. Read Your Progress
Finally, you must be able to read your actions and see how you are progressing according to your goal. This way, you know how well or how bad you are doing and you can make adjustments to your performance. Give yourself a push if you are lagging behind or give rewards to yourself whenever you do well.
Conclusion
Aiming for a better performance means that you are on your way to excellence. This is a good thing as you get to become a better person. Just take these techniques seriously and you will go far and succeed in your endeavor.
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Leon Edward helps people improve in Leadership Development, Goal Setting, Success, Motivation, Self-Improvement, Happiness, Memory Improvement, Stress Reduction and more through his articles, blogs, reports and self-help success roladex-on-line. Visit his Success-Leadership Library, Articles at http://www.AwesomeSuccess.org
Leon Edward also helps people improve IQ, focus, memory, concentration, creativity, speed reading, public speaking , time management and reducing stress.
Download his IQ Mind Brain Memory Self-Help library at his website http://www.IQMindBrainLibrary.com
How to Deal With Depression
Everybody has experienced "I don’t want to get out of bed" feeling. It is normal and ignoring the alarm clock to sleep some more getting a few bites of rich creamy chocolate or any comfort food, or talking with friends usually eases the gloomy feeling. Nevertheless, you should know the thin line between "I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed" from "I wish I never woke up anymore." Watch out for possible signs of depression among friends and yourself, especially if you are experiencing it right now. The following survival tips will surely help you cope with depression.
Cry. Cry if you need to. Cry until you cannot cry no more if it is the only way to lighten up your feelings a little bit. Crying is good since it cleanses the body from stress. Crying is one of the best ways to let go of all the bottled up emotions you have been keeping inside.
Cry if you need to. Cry until you cannot cry no more if it is the only way to lighten up your feelings a little bit. Crying is good since it cleanses the body from stress. Crying is one of the best ways to let go of all the bottled up emotions you have been keeping inside.Talk to someone. When you feel down down, it is good advise to have someone to listen to all your rants and raves. This is not just because you need advice badly but a set of ears letting you know that someone has time to take notice of your feelings is already enough. Purging out your emotions to a friend, family member or even a psychiatrist serves as a catharsis to unload yourself of your frustrations. Do not be afraid to admit that you are having emotional difficulties; it is not a sign of being abnormal. Rather, it is a sign of acknowledgement and willingness to work on the issue.
When you feel down down, it is good advise to have someone to listen to all your rants and raves. This is not just because you need advice badly but a set of ears letting you know that someone has time to take notice of your feelings is already enough. Purging out your emotions to a friend, family member or even a psychiatrist serves as a catharsis to unload yourself of your frustrations. Do not be afraid to admit that you are having emotional difficulties; it is not a sign of being abnormal. Rather, it is a sign of acknowledgement and willingness to work on the issue.Keep yourself busy. Keeping yourself busy will draw your attention into something else. Try reading a good book or attending a gym class so you will not think of anything bad to do. Boredom can make people do things they should not do otherwise. As Elle Woods from the movie "Legally Blonde" said, "Exercise gives you endorphins; endorphins make you happy; happy people don’t kill other people." On the other hand, if you have a friend who has a suicidal tendency, never ever leave him alone. If possible, try to contact a psychiatrist for her or inform her guardians or immediate family about his condition.
Keeping yourself busy will draw your attention into something else. Try reading a good book or attending a gym class so you will not think of anything bad to do. Boredom can make people do things they should not do otherwise. As Elle Woods from the movie "Legally Blonde" said, On the other hand, if you have a friend who has a suicidal tendency, never ever leave him alone. If possible, try to contact a psychiatrist for her or inform her guardians or immediate family about his condition.Rekindle your relationship with Him. Sometimes when you feel that the whole world is against you, making a deep connection with a divine force – God, in whatever language you call Him - will do wonders. You can tell Him everything. If you find confessing to friends and family is not possible, then He is the best bet to seek comfort.
Sometimes when you feel that the whole world is against you, making a deep connection with a divine force – God, in whatever language you call Him - will do wonders. You can tell Him everything. If you find confessing to friends and family is not possible, then He is the best bet to seek comfort.Realize that there are things beyond your control. You cannot keep bad things from happening but you still have control on how to react to them. Remember, things can get out of hand whether you like it or not. Getting into a mess does not mean that you will not get out of it at all. People do make mistakes but it is not a reason to turn away from the world.
You cannot keep bad things from happening but you still have control on how to react to them. Remember, things can get out of hand whether you like it or not. Getting into a mess does not mean that you will not get out of it at all. People do make mistakes but it is not a reason to turn away from the world.Smile. Smile those blues away. There is always tomorrow. The future is always full of hope for better things.
Leon Edward helps people improve in Leadership Development, Goal Setting, Success, Motivation, Self-Improvement, Happiness, Memory Improvement, Stress Reduction and more through his articles, blogs, reports and self-help success roladex-on-line. Visit his Success-Leadership Library, Articles and blog at http://www.AwesomeSuccess.org
Leon Edward also helps people improve IQ, focus, memory, concentration, creativity, speed reading, public speaking , time management and reducing stress.
Download his IQ Mind Brain Memory Self-Help library at his website http://www.IQMindBrainLibrary.com
Leon Edward Helps people to start, grow and maximize online business income with training articles, reviews, marketing log... ideas and opportunities. Download his FREE Report - How to Find A Solid Home Business Opportunity without Getting Scammed! - Find online business training articles, an internet business in a box, FREE Content , starting a business free ideas, residual internet income opportunities and top network marketing home based businesses...
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As guest speaker at the Boy Scouts’ jamboree however, you now find that despite your expertise and the importance of your talk, your audience seems uninterested; even slightly confused. Here lies the big difference between knowing a subject matter well and communicating it to others effectively.
These 10 helpful nuggets should help you get your message across.
1. KNOW YOU AUDIENCE
Be aware of the general demographic of your audience. The factors of age, educational attainment and economic background should dictate the level at which to design your talk. Your doctorate gobbledygook won’t be helpful to the rural agricultural workers waiting to hear you. In the same light, a graduate school audience may become bored with a simple linear presentation. Younger audiences may need conceptual statements to be broken down into concrete examples they can relate to.
2. LEVEL-OFF AT THE BEGINNING
· As you begin your talk, spend some time introducing the subject matter and your personal involvement in it.
· Use the introduction as an opportunity to define terms and spell-out any acronyms that may be specific to your field.
· Try to gauge topic awareness among members of your audience by asking for a show of hands on questions that begin with "How many of you have heard of…" or "How many of you have ever wondered about…". This is also a good way of breaking the ice and engaging your listeners.
3. MAKE USE OF VISUAL AIDS WISELY
· In some instances, an image can speak more clearly than words. When appropriate, present photos to depict important aspects of your topic. When dealing with abstract ideas or the relationship between processes, show them a diagram to physically represent the interactions involved.
· Allow a slight pause, for the audience to absorb a visual. Once they’ve had a few seconds to take it in, you can continue speaking and they’ll be ready to listen to you again while mentally connecting the visual aid to your point.
· Avoid wordy PowerPoint slides that mimic verbatim what you’re already saying in your speech. Instead of enhancing the talk, the visual aid becomes redundant and tempts students to just read the slide instead of listen to you.
4. USE NOTECARDS WITH BULLET POINTS, DON’T MEMORIZE
· Outline the flow of your key points on note cards. Small index cards are better than whole sheets of paper because it’s easier to keep track of where you are in the talk.
· Use bullet points to highlight your ideas. Don’t write out entire sentences on your notes that you might be tempted to memorize. It’s easier to remember your outline and expound spontaneously if you memorize the ideas instead of the exact words
5. USE HUMOR IF SUITABLE, BUT BE TACTFUL
Everyone loves a laugh, so it may be helpful to inject some humor into your speech. Before doing so however, analyze the subject matter and check if it won’t be inappropriate.
If you choose to employ humor, make sure to remain tactful. Stay away from slanted jokes that may offend certain sub-sectors within your audience, such as gender, religion, race, politics and economic status.
Keep the comedy in check. Well-timed snippets may help you establish rapport with your audience, or make monotonous stretches a bit lighter. Too many laughs however may divert the audience’s focus from your key points.
6. MAINTAIN EYE CONTACT
Looking at members of the audience in the eye keeps them involved in your talk. Research has shown that information is more easily received when the listener has both visual and verbal contact with the speaker. Make sure to distribute your attention to audience members in different parts of the room.
7. SPEAK CLEARLY AND MODULATE YOUR VOICE
While the topic is all too familiar to you, it may be a new subject to your audience. Speak slowly and clearly, at a pace that allows your audience to follow your meaning. Make sure you speak loud enough to be heard by the person at the back of the room. For emphasis, briefly pause before and after important ideas or say key points twice before elaborating.
8. KNOW THE SUBJECT MATTER
Nothing beats knowing what you’re talking about inside and out. Research your facts and make sure you have a good grasp of the issues involved. Have a comprehensive understanding of your topic. Where it applies, be aware of both sides to a polarized discussion about your subject. Anticipate questions the audience might raise.
9. ENCOURAGE Q & A
To further nail down the message behind your speech, encourage questions and clarifications through an open forum after your talk. Before you begin the forum, set a time limit or a predetermined number of questions you can accommodate. You may want to discuss this beforehand with the organizers
to make sure that you can fit everything within the time allotted for you.
10. SUMMARIZE and DISTRIBUTE HAND-OUTS AFTER TALK
Before you end, summarize your most salient points and repeat the ideas you want your audience to take home with them. You can outline a summary in the form of a hand-out to be given to the audience afterwards. Don’t pass the hand-out into the audience before or during your talk t because you want them to listen to you first and not just be reading distractedly.
With these 10 pointers in mind, you’re on your way to becoming a much sought-after resource person, known both for your expertise in your field and your skill in communicating. More importantly, you can be sure that your message is getting across to your public loud and
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Breathing deeply means that your body relaxes, allowing it to absorb more oxygen. When the brain gets more oxygen, it is able to function better. Taking deep breaths also wakes you up and makes you feel more alert. If you have low levels of oxygen in the brain, it does not work as well as it could. Breathing through your nose is a good idea because it is harder to breathe shallowly this way.
Meditation is a good way to improve brain power because it encourages deep breathing and encourages you to relax. Relaxation encourages deep breathing and vice versa. This means you can easily focus on the task at hand.
Regular exercise and a good posture can also help you to increase your brain power. You can do an experiment to prove this works. Try to solve a math problem while you are slouching on the sofa and then sit up straight and try again. When your body feels comfortable, your brain follows.
Regular exercise is important and can be anything from a brisk walk to some swimming or light jogging. You do not need to pump iron at the gym for hours every day or do anything more strenuous than you are comfortable with. You just need to get some blood flowing to your brain and exercise takes care of that.
Another important factor is sleep, which is very beneficial for the brain and mind. Sleep quality is as important as sleep quantity. Different people require different amounts of sleep depending on age and other factors, but everyone needs a good quality of sleep. If you are well rested, it means your brain is more refreshed and alert upon waking and will perform better.
Another way of increasing your concentration levels and memory is drinking tea. Herbal supplements such as gingko have been used for many years to increase the blood flow to the brain. The effect is quick like when you drink coffee but consumers do not experience long term adverse effects like with coffee. Sniffing the herb rosemary might do the trick too. Some people swear this perks them up.
If you have a large intake of sugar and carbohydrates, this can make you sluggish and slow down your thought processes. This is because of insulin. If you need all your brain power, for example if you have to sit an exam or attend an important meeting, give potatoes and other carbohydrates, and sugar, a miss.
Listening to classical music has been found by researchers to improve a child's IQ. Children who are used to hearing classical music show a superior ability to solve puzzles and score higher in spatial reasoning intelligence tests.
Writing is good for the brain too because it exercises your creativity and improves your analytical thinking. Keeping a diary, an idea journal or writing some short stories or poetry will boost your intelligence and can also be fun.
Conversation keeps your mind sharp, especially when you are explaining things. This improves your own understanding of the matter. Debates are good exercise for the brain but try to remain objective. When you take an argument further just to win it that is when ego takes over and the mind steps back.
One of the best things to enhance your IQ is to have faith in the fact that you are clever. Positive thinking is great and brings impressive results. Remember all the times you have shown your intelligence or been creative and you will re-experience them.
Leon Edward helps people improve IQ, focus, memory, concentration, creativity, speed reading, public speaking, time management and reducing stress.
Download his IQ Mind Brain Memory Self-Help library at his website http://www.IQMindBrainLibrary.com
Leon Edward helps people improve in Goal Setting, Success, Leadership, Motivation, Self-Improvement, Happiness, Memory Improvement, Stress Reduction and more through his articles, blogs, reports and self-help success roladex-on-line. Visit his Success-Leadership Library, Articles and blog at http://www.AwesomeSuccess.org
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Be wary and avoid the pitfalls of time management. Here are a couple perpetrators:
1. Lethargy. This is one of the worst schedule interruptions. Most of the time we feel tired not because of any valid physical or emotional stress but because we are simply lazy. We let the power of indolence take over the wheel so that we can go to the backseat and indulge in some useless dawdling.
This is one of the worst schedule interruptions. Most of the time we feel tired not because of any valid physical or emotional stress but because we are simply lazy. We let the power of indolence take over the wheel so that we can go to the backseat and indulge in some useless dawdling.2. Entertainment. You ought to know when to give yourself a break or a personal reward and that is when you have successfully achieved your goals; not when you just started the project or halfway through. This is also one of the major time wasters. The lure of television, cinema, shopping malls, and all other forms of entertainment often made us forget about our priorities. We succumb to the allure of self indulgence even if there really is no reason to do so. Reward yourself when it is due.
You ought to know when to give yourself a break or a personal reward and that is when you have successfully achieved your goals; not when you just started the project or halfway through. This is also one of the major time wasters. The lure of television, cinema, shopping malls, and all other forms of entertainment often made us forget about our priorities. We succumb to the allure of self indulgence even if there really is no reason to do so. Reward yourself when it is due.3. Failure to plan. Committing yourself to an effective time management entails specific planning of goals. You need to come up with a tangible list of what you need to do today, tomorrow, or next month. You need to be realistic about it. Thinking about it is not planning. It is just simply musing. You may remember it now but wait until tomorrow and everything is lost. A list makes all the difference.
Committing yourself to an effective time management entails specific planning of goals. You need to come up with a tangible list of what you need to do today, tomorrow, or next month. You need to be realistic about it. Thinking about it is not planning. It is just simply musing. You may remember it now but wait until tomorrow and everything is lost. A list makes all the difference.4. Failure to say no. It is admirable for someone to be of service to others; truly praiseworthy. To be incessantly available for other people’s requests though is a major blunder to your own schedule. You are messing with your time doing works that are not really yours. It is a commendable attitude but you must either do it in your spare time or do it at a minimal. You should learn when to say no. It spells a big difference between a good time manager and someone who lets others exploit him.
It is admirable for someone to be of service to others; truly praiseworthy. To be incessantly available for other people’s requests though is a major blunder to your own schedule. You are messing with your time doing works that are not really yours. It is a commendable attitude but you must either do it in your spare time or do it at a minimal. You should learn when to say no. It spells a big difference between a good time manager and someone who lets others exploit him.There are a hundred and one reasons why we often lose so much of our precious time. These four tops them all. You should develop a sensible attitude to identify the signs that you are spending your time irresponsibly. Only then can you truly master the art that is time management
]]>There are times when employees wait for instructions and do nothing until they get them. They follow the leader. If you have the drive and ambition to be the leader, than maybe you should try it out.
There are some who believe that leadership is a quality you are born with. However it is more likely that it is a skill that takes many years to develop. It takes not only a lot of drive and determination but also the ability to be the “Bad Guy” sometimes.
It is important to remember that a good leader must be a person who is willing to continuously improve their leadership skills to set an example for your employees.
The definition of leadership is that an in order to be an effective leader you must be able to persuade your employees to accomplish a goal. It is important for a leader to contribute as much as the employee.
A good leader does not need to exert power through fear or intimidation, nor does a good leader harass the employees or use underhanded power plays. A good leader encourages his or her employees to do their best in achieving the goals that are set. Goals that are not so far out of reach that employees feel they can never be met.
A good leader will not have any problem with people following him or her. When they see you have a sense of purpose and an air of confidence, you are more likely to be taken seriously. If you walk around like you are lost and confused then your employees will not respect or follow you.
As the owner of your company you must have a clear vision of where you want your company to go. A mission statement will aid your employees in meeting objective set by you. Make sure that all of upper management understands what the goals you set are so they can make it clear to the rest of the staff.
Being a good leader is not just about telling people what to do. When you lead by example, you are letting your employees know that you will not ask them to do anything you would not do yourself.
Studies have indicated that one of the major factors in building leadership is to gain the confidence of your employees. When your employees trust you, and better yet, respect you, they will give more of themselves to their jobs.
The manner in which you handle your employees will say a lot for your leadership abilities. If you show strength as well as compassion you will be build the confidence of your employees.
When you gain the trust and confidence of your employees, they will understand what you expect of them. Communication is one of the most important factors of being a good leader. Showing them instead of order them will gain their respect quickly.
Using good judgment is also a skill that a good leader uses on a daily basis. You have to be able to clearly assess any situation and make a decision quickly. Your employees will soon realize how vital your judgment is and rely upon it.
Leadership does not include being a know it all. When you ask the opinions of your employees and respect what they have to say, then you will in turn be gaining their respect. Recognizing that your employees may have a lot to say and contribute is showing good leadership skills.
Being a good leader is not a part time job. It is a lot of responsibility. It is important that you remember that being a leader is built on how your employees look at you.
The movie called Patch Adams it the perfect example of a person who failed at the one thing he wanted to do most. After suffering from severe depression and hospitalization, his eyes were opened.
He realized that there were different types of psychiatric illnesses and that with the power of positive thinking, he could heal himself and others as well.
With a positive attitude he was able to help not only himself, but also the patients around him. Using these techniques also brought him the success he always wanted. He became an excellent doctor and changed the way the medical community treated its mentally ill patients.
In order to use self-improvement methods you have to sit down and take a good look at yourself. You need to understand, really understand that you are not a failure. Everyone has limitations, and being aware of that is strength, not a weakness.
The models and actors with perfect bodies that you see on television and movies are a result of strict exercise routines that often include starvation diets and hours upon hours at the gym. This is not what real life is all about. If you want to get in shape or improve your self, then sign up at a fitness center. Personal trainers are available to assist you with a routine that is right for you. Don’t try to become a size one because you see it on TV. See the beauty within yourself even if you are a size ten, everyone else does.
No matter how you are how down you are feeling about yourself, if you find someone who is in the same situation, try and cheer them up. You will not believe how good you will feel about yourself when you help others.
When you make mistakes it is important that you do not feel like you are stupid or a failure. Everyone makes mistakes, some bigger than others. What is important is that you take the experience as a learning experience.
If you feel that there are several areas in your life that need improvement, it is important that you take them one at a time. You have to be realistic, if you try to change too much at once, you are bound to fail and throw yourself back into depression.
In order for self-improvement techniques to work, you will need to be strong. Self-confidence and self-esteem are very important factors when you are trying to build a positive image.
You need to set goals for yourself. Be realistic; don’t set your goals so high that they are not attainable.
The old adage little things mean a lot holds true in everyday life. Letting someone at work know that they did a good job on a project, or a simple hi with a smile on your face can do a lot for the morale of your co-workers.
Take the time to appreciate all the things around you. Stop and smell the flowers once in awhile, you will be surprised at how the sweet fragrance cheers you up.
In order to be respected, you need to respect others. The world is full of people with different likes and dislikes, and different tastes. When you respect someone else’s rights, then it is more likely that you will be respected in return.
At some point in your life, you have probably had the occasion to speak to a large audience. Of course ‘large’ is relative. To some, it can be any number larger than zero, where others don’t start to get uncomfortable until the number reaches over a hundred.
If you are among the number of people who would rather be in the casket than delivering the eulogy, you now the anxiety, along with the sweaty palms, unsteady speech and the fear of blacking out that come with public speaking. Perhaps the worst part is waiting for your turn to speak, whether you are introduced or have to get every body attention yourself. That is the moment of truth.
Perhaps the reason for the fear is that you don’t simply think everyone is looking at you; you know everyone is looking at you and judging what you are saying.
So, you take a deep breath and begin to muddle your way to the speech. At the end there is a sigh of relieve as you try to figure out if you had even holding your breath the whole time.
If this sounds familiar to you, it may help to know that even very confident people still get stage fright from time to time. Even when they have delivered the same speech hundreds of times- think motivational speakers. From time to time, we can all loose our confidence.
If you are looking to be able to deliver an address so that the audience thinks you have everything together, here are a few things to keep in mind before your next speaking engagement.
First, preparation is the key to your success. Make an outline of your speech, being sure to bold the points you want to be sure you hit.
Practice your speech to you friends, family, the dog, whoever will listen. If they have questions try to answer them in the speech. If they offer helpful suggestions, on word usage or flow, take them.
When D-Day comes, make sure you get to the venue as early as possible to feel it out. Is it a large auditorium or a relatively small meeting room? You don’t want to think you are speaking to a room that holds 50 only to find out you have enough room in the hall for 150.
Dress in comfortable clothes that look nice. This will boost your confidence and make your feel more at ease.
Don’t let the audience think that you are not one hundred percent confident and knowledgeable about your topic. After all, they are there to get information from you. If they knew more about the issue at hand, they would be there.
Remember, you have earned the right to speak. Some body somewhere decided you were the best person to present this idea, whatever it may be, to the masses.
And breathe!
High among the list of scary things for many people is the fear of public speaking. Few things can strike fear into the heart of a person and one of them is facing an audience.
At any point in anyone’s life, a person has the opportunity to talk in front of an audience. Everyone who is faced with such a dilemma knows those familiar feelings of anxiety. This situation is often accompanied by sweaty palms, shaky voices, palpitations, and sometimes a few sobs.
It is at this precise moment that “visions” come -- thoughts of being laughed at and ridiculed emerged. You imagine standing frozen in front as you forgot what to say, mumbled along, and placed everyone to sleep.
At this point, you are yanked back into reality by the sound of the presenter introducing your name. What follows next can be pretty ugly.
Those who have experienced similar situations know how difficult and uncomfortable it is to make a speech. Even confident people can sometimes be stopped by stage fright. This has led many people to despise public speaking.
Yet there are people do it with such seemingly relative ease! It is because they know that public speaking is like a skill that can be learned. It can be learned by anyone, including you.
One of the most important things in preparing to make a speech is to maintain a positive mental attitude. Let your fears pass through you and realize that many people have done this before and therefore, you can do it too.
Here are some things to remember in making a speech:
Preparation is key.
You must know your topic inside and out. Write an outline of the speech, highlighting all the key points. Prepare possible questions and answers. It's important to understand the topic and not just to memorize words. That way, even if you forget the words mid-speech, you still have confidence to continue.
Practice as much as possible.
You must practice until you know it by heart. Use a timer to control the pace of the speech. A timer is useful especially if there is a time limit. Practice in front of a mirror and practice in front of friends. Ask for their opinions on how to improve your speech.
Arrive at the venue early and get a feel of the place.
Try rehearsing on the actual podium. Consider your appearance. Dress well in comfortable clothes. This will inspire confidence in your self, as well as, make good impression on the audience.
Breathe deeply.
It is normal to feel anxious before a speech but you can't let nervousness stop you from being effective. Deep breathing increases the flow of oxygen into the brain. This helps maintain a clear mind. It would also be good to have a glass of water on hand.
Don't be afraid of the audience.
Never assume that the audience knows more about the topic than you do. The audience isn’t there to hurt you. They are there in order to hear what you have to say. Pretend that the audience is composed of friends and family. Better yet, have one of your friends who listened to your speech attend.
Remember to maintain a positive mentality at all times. Never entertain the thought of messing up. Be confident in your preparations and in yourself. Believe that you can do it and you will.
Anyone can learn to speak in public confidently. All it takes is some practice and a positive mental attitude to overcome this common fear.
- Leon Edward
What is the Law of Attraction? It is a basic principle of life; a powerful force that can be described in these situations:
• You enter a bar and a couple of strangers start looking at you. You can be described as a human magnet! It can also be described in a common statement – "birds of the same feather flock together".
• You like this person and want to go out with him/her. Look and behold, the person sends you a note asking "Can we have dinner tonight?" As it is, he/she likes you and you like him/her.
• Whatever you earn, like money, earns interest and you get to make other investments which make you richer. Another common statement? What you sow is what you reap.
• You are thinking of landing in a managerial position. After a couple of weeks later, the press announces your recent promotion! You got the promotion you dreamed about.
The situations above are just few of the numerous scenarios describing the law of attraction. The Law of Attraction is very easy and fun to learn because you are deliberately gaining what you really desire. The law is in force in our lives right this moment and whether we’re aware or not, we are actually attracting jobs, people and positive situations into our lives. How can you take advantage of these positive situations then?
1. Let it in. Positive situations like these only come once or twice in your life. It is very rare for all your desires be brought to life so why ruin it? Be happy and accept all the blessings pouring into your hands. Let it in. Grab the opportunity. Do not be afraid of success. A good job in a respectable company coupled with benefits to travel abroad? No holds barred, do not inflict any negative thoughts on anything right now! Grab it!
. Positive situations like these only come once or twice in your life. It is very rare for all your desires be brought to life so why ruin it? Be happy and accept all the blessings pouring into your hands. Let it in. Grab the opportunity. Do not be afraid of success. A good job in a respectable company coupled with benefits to travel abroad? No holds barred, do not inflict any negative thoughts on anything right now! Grab it!2. Be direct and clear on what you really desire. If you want to live in a mansion then be it! Your goals are endless and you are the one who are designing it. Limiting your ambitions can recreate a limited positive realization.
. If you want to live in a mansion then be it! Your goals are endless and you are the one who are designing it. Limiting your ambitions can recreate a limited positive realization.3. Imagine and visualize that you are now just a few steps toward your goals. Another positive action is necessary here. Do not hamper your quest to achieve your goals; time will come that all positive vibrations will be present and be prepared about it!
. Another positive action is necessary here. Do not hamper your quest to achieve your goals; time will come that all positive vibrations will be present and be prepared about it!4. Be inspired on what you do! Whether you have gained an unwanted result of a current job relocation assignment, you should be inspired about it and take the lead. Be on the move towards promotion!
! Whether you have gained an unwanted result of a current job relocation assignment, you should be inspired about it and take the lead. Be on the move towards promotion!5. Be responsible of the actions you will make. If you want to enter in a relationship then take part and get it going. The law of attraction is present here and you should responsibly act in any circumstances.
. If you want to enter in a relationship then take part and get it going. The law of attraction is present here and you should responsibly act in any circumstances.6. Move forward. You were given this opportunity so move fast and move forward. For example, don’t be left hanging when all your friends are going abroad and taking advantage of the opportunity to study for free if you have the same chance. If you want it, move!
You were given this opportunity so move fast and move forward. For example, don’t be left hanging when all your friends are going abroad and taking advantage of the opportunity to study for free if you have the same chance. If you want it, move!7. Leave your comfort zone and develop your potential. You have hidden skills waiting to be unveiled so stretch beyond and feel capable. Get into the game, learn new skills and pursue your goals!
. You have hidden skills waiting to be unveiled so stretch beyond and feel capable. Get into the game, learn new skills and pursue your goals!You cannot fight the law of attraction; you have to let it be and let it in. You have to deal with it and use it to your own advantage. So dream big and achieve! Welcome every challenge and neglect the fears and failures that you may encounter. You might not get what you want but in the end, you might observe that what you gained is far better than what you wanted.
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